when I was involved with our PTO the Principal would bully everyone around ie yelling, making threats, things like that, the person tried to get to them to pay for things that they were not buy PTO charter responsible for. I ended up quiting I just got tired of being the whipping boy any time the person got upset. Now I am getting phone calls from that person telling me I need to come in for meetings with the superintendent because someone said I said something bad.... I didn't say it. What do I do?? Can they do that??
This sounds like an opportunity to give some concrete feedback about the principal's antics. I wouldn't worry about the accusation- just stick to the facts. Think of it this way: Maybe your meeting will help out many other parents. It's just not right that this principal is discouraging people from volunteering at their kid's school! Keep us posted!
1. Start with a notebook; write down all incidents you can remember/dates/what was said, witnesses, location: to the best of your ability. Your facts will give you creedence in a discussion with the Superintendent.
2. Make sure your meeting is with the superintendent ONLY. No other individuals who are involved in this. They will only interrupt and possible agitate you or misdirect your thoughts.
3. Ask exactly what the accusation is and why it was neccessary for you to have this meeting.
4. First comment, "I am a parent, proud to have my child in this school system (if not, who cares), and have made the effort to volunteer and do somthing good for my child's school." "However, the circumstances and behavior of the principal Mr/Mrs (?) made it necessary for me to resign my position with the PTO. This saddens me because I feel the students and teachers are deserving of a cooperative principal and would benefit from all the PTO has to offer the school."
5. Refer to comments/situation provided by Superintendent. "I understand that you have hear this (?) about me. I have in no way/Was in no way responsible for this type of action/behavior and am disappointed that something like this has reached the level of your attention. I do feel that you need to be aware of the problems I faced when dealing with Mr/Mrs (?) regarding school/PTO business." If there is a situation that you were involved, explain the circumstances and the reasons for your actions.
6. Provide information from your notes and conclude that you found objectionable behavior from a Principal, a leader in the school system who acted out by yelling and bullying. This does not display the leadership or maturity that you expected the school district to provide when placing your child in their care.
7. State that you hoped to resolve the issue that caused this to end up in the Superintendent's office and (if you are willing) offer to continue your position in the PTO with the understanding that you are to be treated with respect and offer it in return. However, you hope that the Superintendent will personally look into the situation in the school as it may directly affect the performance and moral of all the teachers. Thank him for his/her time.
8. Do not get flustered and be clear in your comments.
9. If someone else has taken your position, please be courteous enough to pass on any pertinent business information that may help them. If asked about the stated incident, explain you met with the Superintendent and it was resoved but you do not care to resume your role in PTO.
10. You can always volunteer in other areas of the school. That way, you can still observe the behavior of the principal throughout the day, make notes, and be of great help to an overworked teacher system.
Good luck. If in a small town, you are up against a system of friends who cover for each other but you can still be a valuable parent in the school district. Best advice: ALWAYS stand up for your child.
The person in question will be at the meeting which does bother me because again they are a bully and are very big on talking over people. Also our Superintendent is a sub. Our district can not get anyone to take the Job.
I think I am going to send the person an email stating that I have resigned and am only a parent and that if they should only contact me if it has to do with my child and only if it deals with my child.
We will have to see how that goes, because to be honest I really hate dealing with this person. One of those I would rather have a root canal kind of things.
If you don't trust the principal or board to not retaliate, then you need to see a lawyer to get help and get your rights protected. Go to some place like chattorney or legalzoom and get protected. Legalzoom has more lawyers, and chattorney has free chat with lawyers, and there are more sites out there to get you helped.
I understand the fact that it is easier to e-mail, but that says to me the principal intimidates you. This alone makes me hope you will change your mind and get it on the record so to speak with the superintendent even if s/he is a sub. There must be a board of education to whom the super reports.
The fact of intimidation concerns me because if the principal is acting this way around the adults - what's happening with/to the children?? I would urge you to do it for the children. Maybe you could bring someone with you but still demand the super and principal be the only ones there.