HELP WITH A DIFFICULT PARENT AND A FUNDRAISER ISSUE.

Our school decided to sell chocolate town candy bars for a fundraiser. We have a small school of a 100 children aged k-3.We sent home a note about the fundraiser or parents who didn't want to do the fundraiser could participate in a $20 buy out. We had a mother write a note that said DO NOT SEND HOME candy with my child we are already selling candy from a previous fundraiser{FOOTBALL}
The PTO decided as a group to write a nice letter explaining how important PTO funding is to the school and the long list of things we fund.Also how we didn't expect people to sell the whole box any help towards the school and PTO would be appreciated no matter how small.
We now got a return letter saying she was deeply offended and that we were writing letters of extortion to her. She threatened to turn us into the Attorney general and the person a head of Bocees{why that one i don't know}. She also demanded financial audits for the last two years.Although our records are certainly available to the public at meetings and on the minutes.Making copies for two years of reports would cost alot of money especcially for a parent who chooses to suport local sports instead of her children's school.Is the a material fee that some PTO's charge or a fourm to fill out to properly request for copies? Any help, suggestions, or ideas?

In our school district some families can incur up to 6 fund raisers at the same time. Most just do what they can, but are not necessarily offended.
Anyway, I know that our city hall has public records but if you want copies of things there is a nominal fee. I would certainly figure out how much it would cost to reproduce the records and let her know that you can supply them for that cost. (The city also has 30 days to come up with those copies). I do not know of any other guidelines for this.
I would also not hold it against her for supporting the sporting boosters. I personally belong to our Athletic Boosters (do not even have a student in the program) Music Boosters and 3 PTAs.
All of these groups are supporting our students in one way or another and all are an important part of the students in our district.
Last year I was stuck with way more candy bars (middle school Washington trip, Orchestra kids field trip and Marching band trip) all at once so I do feel her pain, but not her attitude.
I have seen candy bars used for small trips of classes and groups but not as a PTO/PTA fundraiser.
Even our big fundraiser at the middle school we get 25-30 families order out of about 420 students so right off the bat I would know that there is no way I can make any $ if it were candy bars with only a fraction of our families participating. Best Wishes Let us know how it turns out.

Well, hindsight is allways 20-20 but I probably would not have supported sending the second letter directly to the parent. As plw said sometimes you get conflicting fundraising going on at the same time and it sounds like she had already committed to the previous one.

I would take the high road. You aren't going to win any points here! I would write a short note of apology stating that you in no way meant to offend her or to extort her, only to inform and encourage her participation. Offer to make all records available for her inspection at a regular meeting, or if that is not convenient offer to have your treasurer (or someone with the books) meet her at a copy center where she can make copies for herself. Invite her to the meetings where copies are available on a regular basis. (Note: we also put a few extra copies of budgets and financial statements in a wall file in the office. You might consider this and let her know that the records are available for the current month in the office) If you answer back with a price to make the copies you will probably further annoy her! KILL HER WITH KINDNESS!

I agree apologize to this parent but after that DROP IT!! I really hate to tell you this but I would have been at you meeting with the chocolate and a few words.

I have sent many fundraisers back to school and the PTO and have NEVER recieved a letter. With four children I hate to think about things to come!

I know there is no obligation but parents feel obligated and can and will get fundrairer to death!

Maybe I am misreading what actually occured. If you are upset about a parent refusing to become involved in a fundraiser that's one thing. To offer parents the opportunity to 'buy out' of a fundraiser seems to be a no-no. We all have obligations to other things in the community besides school. I am a PTO president. If I did that to any parent I would be fried at the next meeting...if not sooner. If someone can't offer finacial help, there may be a really important way for them to be involved, ie: volunteering, ect. The real point here doesn't seem to be a difficult parent. I would have had the same impression about the 'buy out'....I wouldn't have asked for copies of stuff, I would have come directly to you to ask if you knew people were upset by the approach taken. My guess is that she's not the only one feeling this way, just the most verbal. Why not get things straightened out at the next meeting? Let her , and other parents like her know what your intentions really were? Sure can't hurt to try to keep other parents happy and keep a PTO around for the long haul.

I agree an apology letter (or phone call) is need and let it go. Why is she asking for your documents? Do you feel she if going to take this further? If so, I would not contact her. I would contact your school district adminstration to advise what has happened and I am sure they can give you advise regarding how to handle. Start with the principal then a business administrator, or assistant super. Cover yourself now.