I'm a dad who is all too new to this PTO thing and guess who's running it? ME... I had my first PTO General Meeting in October and I though the whole thing went sour. The reason is there's one mom who is so negative that she poisoned the whole meeting and set the tone for the rest of the meeting.

I have a few questions for the experienced:
1. How do you deal with people who are negative and counterproductive in your PTOs? 2. How do I keep the meeting going and stay within the time limit w/o using Robert's Rules? and
3. Since we're not using Roberts Rules, is that okay and do meeting minutes need to be documented for record keeping?

Heeeeelp!

Our PTO committee is also all new and it is operated very informal for now. There are two suggestions that we use. 1. We set an agenda, each topic is allowed about 5 to 10 minutes. Our president uses an egg timer. We have had to use the timer due to negative parents.

After the agenda is met, we allow parents to discuss new issues.

Secondly, We have asked that our principle step in and manage parents when needed. Most of the issues that become problems are issues that need to be addressed to the principle or the school board.

Keep minutes, we post ours with a PTO newsletter each month.

Don't let these parents get you down!

Hi, from one dad pres to another. Here are a couple of tips if you do not do it already. When I first started off, we had a few long out of hand meetings as well. Have an agenda, I usually make one with the things that I was to discuss plus others that ask me to speak plus stuff from the executice meeting and then I add the regular monthly report ie treasury report. At the start of the meeting I try to set a time limit by saying, we have a long agenda but lets try to get it done in one hour. This will aid in moving things along.

We are somewhat informal and never have the reading of the minutes or anything.
The minutes are kept and sent out in the newsletter for all to see.

As far as negative parents, it comes with the territory and everyone handles it differently. Lead by example, prove that what you plan will work, show that the PTO is going in the right direction and the critics will quiet down. Or you can take the approach " Well Mrs. X, since you do not seem to like the way this is going, why don't I put you down as the chair person and then you can take care of the problems for us". or if nothing is working, just state out right that you only have time for positive comments and that to many negative remarks is not good for the organization.

Hope this helps, remember we are there for the kids, not the other parents.

good luck

Hi gilbert- first and for most THANK YOU for stepiing up to a very difficult plate!! I have been an officer for three years and there are ways to do what you need to do.
1. You do need an adjenda if not for the membership, for you to keep yourself on track.
2. No, you don't NEED 'Robert' to go by BUT he can help when it comes to proticall (sp)
(I keep a short version in my bag mainly for me)
3. As far as the member you can't wait to see (I have 2!) think about how you would handle a teenager- when we have alot of issues to discuss a time limit helps (3 mins) and a sense of humor. Also a reminder to the parent there ARE OTHERS here that may have something to say. I have also asked this mom to catch me later and we can discuss her feelings in more detail--not for everyone but sometimes it works!

Once again, thank you for taking the reins; stepping up to the plate; showing just how crazy you really are!! (I'm kidding!) So many would rather sit back and tell you what you are doing wrong than try swinging the bat! Hope I have helped some and keep in the game!
Okay I'm still coming off the World Series- 4 boys in the house it'll take time!!

I really just wanted to reply in regards to the negative parents. I am the PTO president and I can honestly say that our PTO board does not have any negative parents ever. The reason? Well, because in the past any time a parent was negative about something and suggested that what we were doing what not good or could be better I would tell them in front of everyone that they were right and ask them if they would like to chair something else of their choice. Here is just one example: We had a father daughter dance and one parent got upset because she only had daughters. Well guess what. Your right! We should do something for Mothers and Daughters too. Would you be willing to chair this? It pretty much puts a stop to it immediately. Hope this helps!

Just a quick confirmation of Sam's reply. I have dealt with "unhappy" parents in the same manner. When they have a complaint, I always offer for them to come up with a better idea. When they do (they always do), I ask "do you feel strongly enough about that to put leadership behind it?" Unfortunately, they never have. It is a nice way to quiet the complainers and find potentially good ideas and strong volunteers.