[twinma]

What Would You Do If You Know That You Are Getting Mistreated By Tyour Schools Pto Board And You Are Also On The Board?

[CrewChief]

Well, that's a wide open question! I'm sorry to hear that you feel mistreated. When we go into volunteer work it's usually with the best intentions and the hopes for a positive experience. It's hard to offer advice without knowing the very basic structure of the situation. Advice would vary based on personality issues, "Mean Girl" tactics, different interpretations of bylaws or issues, general disagreements about what your group should or shouldn't do. I guess without knowing any of that I'd suggest that you ask yourself the following questions:

1. What is the root of the problem? (personal, business, legal)
2. Am I contributing to it? (sensitive, rigid opinion, not following bylaws)
3. Is there a way to a solution? (Can they/I change?)
4. Am I willing to help work toward a solution?
5. If there's no light at the end of the tunnel, do I stay or do I go? (Is it worth it to you?)

'mean girl' tactics (see the book by that title) mentioned above refers to bullying tactics done by females and are prevalent in workplace as wel as volunteer organizations, basically anywhere people come together and work together sets the potential stage for those kinds of things.
IF you think that is what is going on, there are plenty of books out there on how to deal with bulies in the workplace, as well as web infos.
It is a problem in many organizations and its worst when the managers or those in charge are the ones doing the bullying. If its not bullying then good old fashioned communication and face to face addressing the root issues and agreeing on a solution is always the best first step so ther are no misunderstandings.
good luck.

The hole thing is that we are planning our yearly father daughter dance and we had to vote on a photographer. well me being one put my bid in along with another person and I won and now the other person is complaining about it and what's us to have another vote. but we had a vote at out monthly meeting and everyone voted for me. also she is saying that I am on the borad that I got to see her bid, but I did not see it. I am not really sure what to do about it. But I feel that I am getting treated unfar because I did what I was suppose to do. and the other person does not want to lose so she is trying to find things wrong with my bid. saying I copied hers. but not true. I was even nice enough to call her to have he put her bid in when the time came. but I am the one who looks bad becouse of her. and my board is saying that ow I have to step down as head fundraiser person. I am not sure why. I need some help on what to do. thanks

To outsiders, it could EASILY look like aconflict of interest situaiton, regardless of the facts and proper ethics and rule following procedures that were involved.

If you are on the board, and you really want that job you were properly voted to get, then you do have to accept the consequences of the whole perspective issue, becuase it probably wont go away and might be in the minds of ohters who arent involved and havent said anything to you.

Its basically something only you can decide on, if the benefits of keeping the won bid outweigh these types of downsides which you are experiecing now, the whole perspective matter.

Also, if you are a 501c3 group, you might check if its even allowed to have board members bid on jobs paid for by the same organization.

[LUVMYKIDS]

This is my opinion now, so please don't get angry. If I was in your place, I wouldn't have even submitted a bid. Why? For the very reasons you're seeing now. It might have been different if you volunteered your services at no charge or for just the cost of supplies. Then there wouldn't have been a bidding situation.

My recommendation would be to turn down the job and let your membership vote on another choice. As for the board asking you to step down as fundraising chair, that seems kind of extreme. I could understand if they were asking you to turn down the photography job, but giving up your board seat?

[Silver Fox]

Now that we know a bit more about the situation I would have to agree with the previous post regarding 'conflict of interest.' In the past we have had parents join fundraising committees and suggest we use them. In each case I have thanked the parents for their suggestion and have declined the offer even if they promise their cut of the sale to the cause. IMHO gambling on the 'perception that a parent is profiting from a fundraising opportunity' would be devastating to the PTO's reputation. Our policy is to use vendors who do not have ties to the school so that all is fair and 'rumors of perception' do not have the opportunity to grow.

[CrewChief]

twinma - Unregistered is giving you very good advice. I have to agree. Perception is reality and if people perceive that you got a special favor because of your role as an officer then no amount of proof to the contrary will change their minds.

I don't know 501c3 laws very well. I can't comment on the 'legality' of you bidding for the job. If it were my team, though, I would have discouraged officers from bidding in the first place based on my interpretation of our bylaws:

The PTO shall be a non-commercial, non-sectarian, non-partisan entity. No commercial enterprise and no candidate shall be endorsed in their official capacities; shall be used in any connection with a commercial concern or with any partisan interest; or for any purpose other than the regular work of the organization.

While this policy speaks of the PTO as a group, I would hold each individual officer to that policy as well.

Based on my own beliefs of how I would like to see someone approach the situation, I'll say that I think you should withdraw your bid, apologize privately to the board members and other photographer and allow her to take the job.

You might be wondering why you need to apologize because you really don't feel like you did anything wrong. You probably didn't. The point, though, is to take the high road to rebuild relationships. These ladies were probably wrong to accept your bid in the first place. Once they saw the fallout they realized the error but can't quite accept all of the blame. And some of the blame does fall on you. You are one of the officers too and should hold the team's reputation in higher regard than a temporary financial gain.

If, however, there is truly a hardship and this money is needed then I agree that you should step down to prevent any perception of impropriety.

[Rockne]

Nothing in that bylaws clause or in the 501(c)(3) regulations prevents a member or an officer from providing paid services to an organization, as long as those paid services are real and priced at defensible market rates.

That said, I agree that the real problem here is perception. And when we're talking about an open quasi-public group, perception matters. A lot.

Tim

[CrewChief]

You're right, Tim. I appreciate your accurate explanation of the bylaws clause. Nothing in there prohibits an inividual member from profitting. Knowing that community, I let the rigid 'interpretation' that I inherited stand. Everyone always believed it to be true and it sure did save a lot of headaches like twinma is struggling with right now. But, honestly, if anyone challenged that interpretation I would have had to concede and simply plead my case based on perception and reputation.