1. Announce that Oprah’s camera crew will be dropping by your meeting to shoot footage of involved parents for an upcoming episode.

2. Have your principal square off in a Dance Dance Revolution marathon with the kids while their parents talk PTO.

3. Offer free manicures and pedicures every month—just for signing in!

4. Have committee chairs sing their reports, then judge their performances American Idol-style.

5. Say the magic words: “Guest speaker J.K. Rowling.”