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Humor
PTO Mom
Are You Right for the PTO?
Take our simple test to see whether your personality type makes a good PTO parent.
We’re faced with choices every day of our lives, some more critical than others: What type of career should I pursue? Which breed of dog should I own? What type of person is my ideal mate? For help, many people turn to personality tests and skills assessments. But as far as I can tell, none exist for another of life’s big questions: Am I a good PTO parent? We’ve attempted to fill this gap by creating the following unscientific test. Please read each question and select the answer that best describes you.
1. I’m not myself if I get less than:
a. 8 hours of sleep a night
b. 10 hours of sleep a night
c. 6 hours of sleep—a week
2. I like to unwind by:
a. curling up with a good book
b. going for a leisurely walk
c. practicing my Excel spreadsheet skills
3. Discussions among my circle of friends tend to get heated when they involve:
a. religion
b. politics
c. the relative fundraising merits of product sales vs. silent auctions
4. The most dangerous item in my home is:
a. the circular saw
b. the rat poison
c. the freezer (opening the door sets off a frozen cookie dough avalanche)
5. When I go to a restaurant, I tend to:
a. order a new dish every time
b. order the same dish every time
c. pilfer the sugar packets for our monthly teacher appreciation coffee
6. When I get dressed in the morning, I like to wear:
a. casual clothing
b. professional attire
c. at least one article of school spiritwear
7. If I had to decide between two homes to live in, I would choose the one that:
a. offered the best value for the price
b. had the largest yard
c. included ample storage space for kiddie carnival supplies
8. When my children argue, I:
a. send them to their rooms
b. tune them out
c. put them to work counting out box tops
9. When I wake up at night, it’s because I am:
a. worrying about money
b. thinking about everything I have to do the next day
c. lying on top of something—quite possibly the cordless phone and a clipboard with the volunteer list
10. When the school year ends, I:
a. take off my watch and put it in a drawer
b. spend as much time in the pool as possible
c. spend the first three weeks writing thank-you notes to everyone who helped make the school year a success
Now tally up your answers. If you selected “c” the majority of the time, you are an ideal PTO parent. If you mostly responded “a,” you are a fabulous match. And if you answered “b” most frequently, you guessed it—you and the PTO simply belong together. Because unlike picking a career, a dog breed, or a romantic partner, you can’t go wrong by joining the PTO.
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