Abide by the principal's directive. You, as a representative of the PTO and (presumably) a fellow parent, should not get into the middle of this situation.

This parent is unhinged and the worse thing that could happen is if you attempt to address her issues head-to-head. Since she's hung on to all this aggression and anger for a year over an extraordinarily minor issue, she will not listen to, or agree with, any response -- no matter how reasonable.

Her "M.O." is go to war --- I bet that each and every teacher who have had her children in their classes can attest to this. So, your best approach is to simply side-step the issue by refusing to engage her any further. Let the school principal handle her.

Is the change in seating due to the school staff requesting it or is a District decision? If the District has set the rules then let the parent know that the District made the rule and give her the contact info for them.

Maybe the 3 of you could have a meeting, again, and although it may not be needed on your end - you could apologize from the PTO for neglecting the working parents of the school and that it is not the intention of the PTO to leave anyone out.

It sounds like this parent is having a problem with both the PTO and the Principal. These should be dealt with separately. Even if the parent is trying to make it all one problem...

As far as getting the by-laws on the website and the timing... Again apologize & let her know that the PTO is doing everything they can to keep the website up to date and trying to get things on it in a timely manner; however everything must be approved either by the Principal or the District prior to posting it. (that's what our school rule is).

I think the PTO should call her & try to work this out with out the Principal first. Take care of the complaint about the PTO. If the parent keeps complaining about the seating then keep directing the parent to the Principal; there is nothing the PTO can do about that.

Not sure if this helped at all... Good luck with this!

Last year our school's policy concerning lunches changed. In the past if you wanted to eat lunch with your student there was plenty of room at the tables and you could just join your child. A redistricting and new table arrangement now leaves fewer seats and a more crowed room. The tables are filled and the children have assigned seats. If you want to come for lunch you are stil welcome to, there is a seperate table that is reserved for guests. Your child and two of their friends can join you at the special table.

At a meeting last November a parent came and was very upset with this change. She tried to involve the principal in a debate during the meeting. I stepped in and thanked her for bringing these concerns to the meeting so the principal would be aware. We told her we appreiciated her concerns and the principal explained the reason for this change. Teachers in attandance discusseed the pros and cons of the new policy and other parents were welcomed to share their thoughts. It was made clear that at this time, there was no intention by the school staff to change the new policy, and it was not up for discussion to have it changed. Parents concerned were invited to attend a private meeting with the principal to discuss it. That was all I heard about it.

Fast forward, almost a year later...

I revieved an email from a parent telling me she was treated poorly at the PTO last year and she wanted to know where she could find in writting what the actual role of our PTO was. I replied asking her if there was a specific area she was concerned about and if I could be of assistance in correcting how she was treated badly. I also sent her a copy of our by-laws as well as a copy of Role of the PTO (from the file exchange board here) that the principal and I had just reviewd and posted on the school website's PTO page.

This upset her even more... The principal and I invted her to attend the Executive Board Meeting prior to our next PTO meeting to discuss this. She denied and said that she would like answers to her questions documented in writting from the principal and I. She now wants an answer to the following statement:

I do not know who wrote this "does" and "does not" list, but it obviously was written in an effort to insult/offend the hard working PTO Volunteers, and not to encourage them to help at school and attend PTO meetings. Where did it come from? When was it written? I do not recall any time during my many years of active involvement ever seeing this, and certainly cannot locate any references to it within the PTO By Laws.(I received 5 pages of By Laws from you-was there more that I missed?). I cannot believe that it has been placed on the school web site. When did this happen? Today? Yesterday? Is the rest of the PTO aware that this was going to be placed there? One would certainly hope that questions and issues could be addressed with the building principal. As I am sure you are aware(given the similarities in your response to statements made to me by the principal), I did address issues directly to the principal(following the PTO meeting). My response from the principal did not "give courteous and thoughtful consideration to all inquiries and suggestions and carefully investigate all complaints" as stated within section 901 of the WSSD Policies and Procedures. Instead she was insulting, defensive, and totally unprofessional-including lying in an attempt to intimidate me. So, parents cannot really address issues directly with the principal, and now cannot ask questions at PTO. Where are we to get answers??? We have always been able to ask questions and raise concerns at PTO meetings in the past. After all, these are our kids and we know them best. We pay the salaries of the staff at the school, so we should be able to have active discussions relating to school matters. This is not about making policies, it is about providing feedback and having our voices heard.

I am totally lost as to how to proceed with this. The principal and I discussed it when I recieved it and she told me to reply with
Thank you for your email. At this point I feel you should contact (School Principal ) with your concerns. She can be reached at the school at XXX-XXXX. And to copy her in the reply. So I did.

Now she wants to specifically addresss her questions from the email above in red.

Any advice?? PLEASE??:confused: