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Question - venting - long

18 years 2 months ago #73826 by msychel
Sorry didn't get back sooner - I've had sick kiddos.

Thanks so much for all the feedback & encouragement. The president did apologize. He understood after talking to me & thinking it over why I wrote what I did. He also said he was glad he was not helping in the planning of this event.

His wife, my friend, also apologized for him. I didn't even say anything to her. Her husband told her what happened and she wasn't sure if he would apologize. I had to laugh about that one.

I know I shouldn't take things so personally & I know I tend to do that. It is actually why I am not on the board this year - I had a very hard time handling some of the bad stuff. I thought if I took a step back & just kept co-chairing the silent auction and helped any where else I was needed it would be better for me. Maybe in a year 7 a half when my youngest starts school I will have grown a tougher skin & I can re-evaluate my place.

Again thanks so much!!
18 years 2 months ago #73825 by Shawn
Replied by Shawn on topic RE: Question - venting - long

Originally posted by Critter:
About 1 month out, would be the right time to change the tone of your pr from preparation to excitement. If you haven't already, start promoting specific auction items, especially those that have special conditions like date restrictions, and those that you predict will generate the most bids. You want people to know your committee is ready, and this is going to be a great night. One approach we've tried is to print a shortened list of some of our auction items in our school newsletter, checklist style, so people can begin pre-planning their bids. You can always add a footnote like, "Donations will be gratefully accepted right up to auction date".

Good luck. Don't take your president's comments too personally.

We do our flyers this way normally, or at least try too. Build up the excitement.
I figure everything I do, print, type or say is gonna offend someone at least once ata some point (Hence my 'equal opportunity offender' shirts I have and wear)

on a side note
Give the pres my email, I'll nicely explain that guilt trips are a viable and successful recruiting/ marketing tool (if not overused) and give him some stats on parent participation and student acheivement :cool:

<font size=""1""><font color="#"black"">Liberalism is not an affilation its a curable disease. </font></font><br /><br><font color="#"gray"">~Wisdom of Shawnshuefus</font><br /><br><font color="#"blue""><font size=""1"">The punishment which the wise suffer, who refuse to take part in government, is...
18 years 2 months ago #73824 by library mom
Replied by library mom on topic RE: Question - venting - long
Phil is right about the volunteers that show up at the last minute. We went through this with our fall festival. We did not put out some of the games due to low committments. We ended up having to turn volunteers away because we didn't need them.
Next year I plan to put out all the games, and if no one shows up to volunteer, then the game doesn't open. If volunteers show up, we'll have something for them to do.
18 years 2 months ago #73823 by Phil Bernstein
Replied by Phil Bernstein on topic RE: Question - venting - long
You are doing just fine - especially since the PTO pres is your best friends husband - forget the conversation took place.

I think it a matter of perspective. His view is of someone who has oversight authority. He doesn't know or understand all the nitty-gritty details of an event like this (and probably shouldn't). On the other hand, nitty-gritty is where you are living with it. You should have a good, honest sense of where your are and how much you (and the rest of the team) can reasonably accomplish between now and the actual event.

From the outside looking in, you might expect to have everything done and sit back and wait until the day of the event to setup (the Pres. perspective). From the inside looking out (yours) that is just not a realistic situation - especially of something this big. The only caution I have is not to wait until the last minute to ask for more help - the fewer surprises the closer to the event the better (although there will be a few).

In terms of asking for volunteers, that is not an unreasonable request. For our big events, we constantl,y ask for volunteers but no one commits until they show up and ask "where can I help?". So it's not unusual.
18 years 2 months ago #73822 by pals
Replied by pals on topic RE: Question - venting - long
I dont see where you were out of line, the second year of our holiday shop we were short volunteers big time. I got the approval to put out a flyer with a person's face with a big question mark on the face. the flyer read have you seen this person? we haven't either...we are still lookinf or volunteers.
this flyer was a little harsh, sent out a week and a half before the shop. I believe that someimes people think you are all set and they just need a reminder. for the record is the father who made the comment volunteering?
As far as the auction part I dont think i would cut off donations either, hey every little bit helps. I would love to do a silent auction but am afraid that the quanity of work would be very hard to accomplish...good luck and dont let anyone tell you different!

&quot;When you stop learning you stop growing.&quot;
18 years 3 months ago #73821 by Rockne
RE: the interpersonal stuff. It sounds like he's a good guy. I bet he regrets saying what he said. Maybe he'll apologize (but maybe he won't -- he is a guy!). With all you've been putting into this, I can understand where you are tonight.

But I hope you can take a (short) bit of time and let things settle back in. You're doing great. On a project like the one you're working on (expansive + long-time-frame) there's no way that you could do everything just as others would, if they were in your shoes. But they're not in your shoes.

Might there be better ways to do certain elements of your project than the ways you've chosen? Highly likely.

Can an auction be great with an imperfect person making imperfect decisions and being criticized by imperfect people? You bet!

Good luck.

Tim

PTO Today Founder
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