Ok.....I'm typing through tears streaming down my face. A few days ago, the tears were sad, frustrated, defeated tears. The tears today are tears of relief that everything will be just fine. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU EVERYONE for all your words of support and helpful suggestions. It's hard to talk to the other board members about things like this for fear of looking weak. I knew I could come here and find the support I needed.

One more question.....according to our bylaws, the May PTO meeting is the time for elections AND forming committees for the next school year. Myself and other strong supporters of the PTO would like to form several new committees for next year to be sure the work we've devoted ourselves to continues if the board is all new. We form commitees AFTER the election results are announced. The plan is to appoint the six current board members to each chair one of the 6 committees next year. Does this sound ok or will it seem mean-spirited if the other candidate is elected to president? Will it appear too controlling? Any other ideas?

I'm confused, how does the nominating committee get to decide who wins and who doesn't? Are they the only ones who decide what names go on the ballot, or are you saying they plan to push for the other candidate? Does the entire school vote, or just those your school considers part of the membership (i.e., paid dues).

Either way, if the other woman wins, she's in for a very rude awakening being as inactive as she was in the past. And the fact that they want you to continue as if nothing changed, says--to me--that they already know their chosen candidate can't step into your shoes and keep the momentum going. Sounds like a situation where this group wants the glory without having to do the work.

Also, what do your bylaws say? We wanted to put in ours that in order to run for a Board position you had to have served on a committee, but given our school's environment, that wouldn't have been feasible. if you have the opportunity to share your accomplishments as president during the election period, I say do that, and then let the voters decide. I think the parents and others who have seen what has happened under your leadership will cast the common sense vote. If your opponent wins, as others have suggested, I would help with the transition and then volunteer for only those things that are most important to you that you want to make sure don't fall by the wayside, everything else, the new president would have to handle, after all, change is good, right? .

I do quite a bit in my position this year as Vice President-- moving to President next year. I couldn't imagine doing as much if I wasn't on the board.
I feel an obligation to be at most events since I'm on the board-- I don't believe I'd have that feeling if I wasn't-- that's not to say I wouldn't chair a lot of the events still that I do now--
Good luck in your situation

I didn't ever think of the nominating committee having anything to do other than nominate candidates. Wow! Kind of slap in the face after all your hard work.

As dlf recommended, you need to respond to whatever happens in a gracious and professional manner. If you are re-elected, be modest and just move on with your group's future plans. If you're not the membership's choice, then finish out your year with your same enthusiam and have the group set to move on. This will be hard, but you're the kind of person who will be able to keep your focus on what is best for the children and find your new niche within the group. I do think it's a bit presumptuous of the board to expect you to still perform all of your previous duties while not holding the title of President, and what about how that would make the newly elected president feel. I say pick the things you enjoy and offer to continue those projects.

Good luck Ona, they're going to be missing you next year!

OntheGo,

Dificult situation you find yourself in. I think about it this way, while I have been President I have gone out of my way to do the best job possible. It sure seems that you have as well. If for whatever reason I was not reelected I would be hurt. I consider this group my "baby" as I have devoted so much of myself to it. Over the past two years I personally have brought numerous new events, increased membership by 66%, increased male active membership by 500%, started a monthly newsletter, created a new website, etc., etc., etc. So just like you I have put so much of myself into this group that if I was not reelected I would take it as a slap in the face.

Now as diff says, the only thing that you truly have control over is how you handle the situation. In this regard I think you should look at all possibilities:

- You do get reelected. If that happens, then no issue, just move forward positvely.

- You don't get reelected. Well then you have a couple of things to think about:

- The remainder of this year. It is your responsibility to do as good of a job as you can for the rest of the year. You need to perform a good turnover so that you, as diff wrote, "allow your legacy to be one that supported the group even when it wasn't easy for you".

- Next year. Here's the tricky one... They expect you, whether President or not, to keep doing eveything that you are doing. Not sure if this is bad, but I know that if I wasn't the President there is just no way that I would be doing all of the things that I am doing. I mean, I'm spending probably 15 - 20 hours a week devoted to this group. If I wasn't the President I would definitely not be doing all of that. That doesn't mean that I would quit, or that I would be taking on certain events or tasks, but something would have to give, meaning that the new President would have to take some things on.

What you may want to do is talk with the new possibly President, or with the nominating committee and see if they would be up for the idea of co-Presidents. That may not be the best choide, but it would be a better alternative to not holding any position in this group that you so obviously love.

Good luck, I truly hope things work out.

PresidentJim

Hi Ona--those of us that have come to know you on these boards know exactly the type of heart and soul you've given your group. They are remarkably better for having had you serve as their leadership. I'm sure this is quite painful for you -- and I'm sure you are working hard to bend your mind around it.
You can only control how you handle this. Other board members will make their statements but truly if this were me (and I'm not continuing next year either) my greatest goal would be to leave the group as healthy and whole as I could. I'd garner as much courage as it took to work toward he end with grace and support the new President coming into place. That will leave a group with the best support for success that you can give it and thus the children with the best chance at continuing with a group that is working for them as a whole. The last place I worked we had a saying "The king is dead...long live the king". It promoted the shifting of loyalties even when we knew the new guy may be way different than what we've bargained for.
Do your best to make the transition smooth, support the organization and allow your legacy to be one that supported the group even when it wasn't easy for you. YOU know what you've brought to that team and frankly NO one could have done it like you've done it. So do your best to make sure that as you leave, and as you CHOOSE what you want to support next year that you don't do so with any regrets. You rock girlfriend and the kids and parents were lucky to have your considerable talents available to them.

d