Hi Gilbert,
I apologize for my delay in posting. I was in the midst of writing a lenghty post last weekend & I lost my connection. I was too tired to start over. So here goes...

There are some really great ideas here! I'll add several more. We not only have an agenda, but it is timed. (ex, 7:00-7:10 Welcome; 7:10-7:15 Approval of minutes from prior meeting, etc...) It works well for us!

Even if you don't use Roberts Rules, it pays to be familiar with it. For instance, there is a limit to the number of times one person can speak on a given topic. I am also a new pres. and have trouble remembering that I AM IN CONTROL of the meeting, noone else. I can diplomatically interrupt someone who has already made a point (& is merely repeating it over & over...) by summarizing what they've said & recommend what be done about. Most often it tends to be something out of the PTO's control, so I can recommend that they speak with the principal. Unfortunately, I'm not very good at actually doing this yet. But after the last meeting dragged on a little too long, I am definitely going to make an effort to be more assertive.

There are 2 helpful websites I've used for RR. Try www.parli.com or www.robertsrules.com

As far as minutes, we have copies for everyone at our meeting. We take 5-10 minutes to read them silently. We then ask for corrections. In the past I don't believe they've been saved, but we plan to this year.

Hope this helps



Hang in there!

Jo

[ 11-25-2001: Message edited by: MightyJo ]</p>

Welcome to the PTO! This is my 4th year and had a difficult parent my 1st year. She would sit & complain about every suggestion or how we went about planning an activity because the past PTO board didn't "do it that way". Well, this soured our meeting for 3 months in a row, and seeing that she never volunteered to help with any of our activities but would show up with her family to sit and be critical, I confronted her at a meeting and asked if she would like to volunteer to head up our next activity that was in the planning stages. Of course she didn't, and had no viable excuse for not helping. This was the last meeting she attended.
An agenda is a must in order to keep things moving. A 1 hour meeting should be sufficient. In fact, we just had a meeting this month,planned our 2 Feb. activities, as we need to begin the 1st of Jan. with contacting businesses for donations,etc. and will not be meeting in Dec. Our PTO is very active, and having Dec. off due to our hard work is a fringe.
Meeting minutes are also a must in order to keep track of what is happening. Our secretary types out the agenda, & then sends out the minutes after the meeting. If you have board members that did not attend, this is the best way to let them know what went on. It also gives you something to look back on especially in planning an activity that you will be doing again the next year.

[ 11-20-2001: Message edited by: RhondaR ]</p>

Just a quick confirmation of Sam's reply. I have dealt with "unhappy" parents in the same manner. When they have a complaint, I always offer for them to come up with a better idea. When they do (they always do), I ask "do you feel strongly enough about that to put leadership behind it?" Unfortunately, they never have. It is a nice way to quiet the complainers and find potentially good ideas and strong volunteers.

I really just wanted to reply in regards to the negative parents. I am the PTO president and I can honestly say that our PTO board does not have any negative parents ever. The reason? Well, because in the past any time a parent was negative about something and suggested that what we were doing what not good or could be better I would tell them in front of everyone that they were right and ask them if they would like to chair something else of their choice. Here is just one example: We had a father daughter dance and one parent got upset because she only had daughters. Well guess what. Your right! We should do something for Mothers and Daughters too. Would you be willing to chair this? It pretty much puts a stop to it immediately. Hope this helps!

Hi gilbert- first and for most THANK YOU for stepiing up to a very difficult plate!! I have been an officer for three years and there are ways to do what you need to do.
1. You do need an adjenda if not for the membership, for you to keep yourself on track.
2. No, you don't NEED 'Robert' to go by BUT he can help when it comes to proticall (sp)
(I keep a short version in my bag mainly for me)
3. As far as the member you can't wait to see (I have 2!) think about how you would handle a teenager- when we have alot of issues to discuss a time limit helps (3 mins) and a sense of humor. Also a reminder to the parent there ARE OTHERS here that may have something to say. I have also asked this mom to catch me later and we can discuss her feelings in more detail--not for everyone but sometimes it works!

Once again, thank you for taking the reins; stepping up to the plate; showing just how crazy you really are!! (I'm kidding!) So many would rather sit back and tell you what you are doing wrong than try swinging the bat! Hope I have helped some and keep in the game!
Okay I'm still coming off the World Series- 4 boys in the house it'll take time!!

Hi, from one dad pres to another. Here are a couple of tips if you do not do it already. When I first started off, we had a few long out of hand meetings as well. Have an agenda, I usually make one with the things that I was to discuss plus others that ask me to speak plus stuff from the executice meeting and then I add the regular monthly report ie treasury report. At the start of the meeting I try to set a time limit by saying, we have a long agenda but lets try to get it done in one hour. This will aid in moving things along.

We are somewhat informal and never have the reading of the minutes or anything.
The minutes are kept and sent out in the newsletter for all to see.

As far as negative parents, it comes with the territory and everyone handles it differently. Lead by example, prove that what you plan will work, show that the PTO is going in the right direction and the critics will quiet down. Or you can take the approach " Well Mrs. X, since you do not seem to like the way this is going, why don't I put you down as the chair person and then you can take care of the problems for us". or if nothing is working, just state out right that you only have time for positive comments and that to many negative remarks is not good for the organization.

Hope this helps, remember we are there for the kids, not the other parents.

good luck