I agree with the others here. I use the agenda to control the meetings. When a topic pops up that is not on the agenda, if it is what I consider PTO business, then no problem, but if it is something that I consider "beyond the PTO", then I curb it. I'll pipe in with something like "Well, that topic is something that you may wish to see the Principal about offline. For the purposes of today's meeting, it is not something that we should be discussing. We have a lot of things to discuss today, so lets get back on subject. Lets move on to the Treasurer's report", or something like that.

In the worst case scenerio that numerous members wish to discuss the topic, but it appears as though it would take up too much time, and may not be something that the Principal is ready to discuss at that time, I may ask the Principal directly something like this:

"Mr./Mrs. Principal's name, we don't have time to discuss this issue here, but it does appear as though this topic is of interest to many here. Would it be possible for you to setup a separate meeting to discuss this topic?"

Of course I would only do this knowing that our Principal would always be willing to do just that, or if we discussed the possibility of this coming up at the meeting and that this would be a possible solution. Personally I like meeting with the Principal beforehand to provide him the agneda and to see if he knows of anything that might be coming up at the meeting.

So my best recommendation is to communicate with the Principal, create and stick to your agenda, and if you need to, cut off discussions that do not belong at the meeting and don't feel bad about doing so. Effectively it is your job!

PresidentJim

Definitely - pick up the "Complete Idiot's Guide to Roberts Rules of Order." It will put meeting managing in a better light for you.

My meetings got so out of control I just went to a timed agenda.

Before the meeting, allot so many minutes for each agenda topic. I take the wristwatch off my arm and set it on the table and keep an eagle eye on it.

If someone starts "side talk" - I politely point to the watch and then say we need to keep on track, if there is time after the meeting I would be happy to bring it up for discussion. (then have a piece of paper handy, to write down their concern).

This little timed agenda has totally saved my sanity and we get a LOT done at our meetings.

The negative nilly's are hard to deal with at first. Just let them know you are trying to keep your meetings on track and on time. Also that you are trying to recruit new leadership into the fold, and you'd really appreciate it if Nilly would project a positive attitude.

Keep trying - you're doing great (heck, you're at the PTO Today website, aren't you?!? )

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Taking firm, but polite control is imperative. I'm copying in some suggestions I posted from a discussion awhile back. Perhaps some of these strategies might help you.

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In conjunction with my work, I'm involved in many committees, educational sessions, and work groups. Often the leaders will have a poster with key reminder points. If someone violates a procedural item, the leader can gently (or not so gently) point to it and get people back on track.

So consider these strategies:

• 1) Agenda - always have one and follow it
• 2) Goal/Mission statement - have poster displayed or include on the top of the agenda
• 3) Meeting Rules - bulleted poster
• 4) Parking lot - flip chart pad (or could just be area in secretary's notes) where you jot things down that are off topic or out of order, but not necessarily out of scope.
• 5) Opening remarks - always start with the goal or mission of the group and cover the "rules" of the meeting. Explain that you will be sticking to the agenda and timeline. Any items relevent, but out of order will be handled at the end if there's time (Parking Lot). Subjects not pertinent to the meeting/PTO's function won't be covered.

Be pleasant, but firm and enforce this plan.
For the poster, keep it simple. Something like:

Meeting Success Strategies

• Start/end on time
• Follow the agenda
• Show respect for other viewpoints and ideas
• Keep discussions meaningful but brief

Your opening remarks will go into slightly more detail as you cover each point on the poster. You can figure out what "rules" you want on the sign, but probably no more than 6, and short phrases.

Stay upbeat and matter-of-fact. You don't want to lecture them or spend too much time. This is just a 5 minute intro that sets the stage for everyone.

Don't feel like a control freak for controlling your meetings! That is what you are there to do. If you left feeling that the meeting was awful, just imagine how the other parents felt -- especially the parents of new students!

My suggestion -- and it doesn't solve every problem, but it goes a long way -- is to learn and use Robert's Rules of Order. You can get the book (RRO in Brief) for about $6 and there is a website with FAQ's and a Q&A section if you have specific questions you can't find answers to. Although it may seem a little intimidating at first, the procedures can save your meetings and your year!

The rules help you keep control of the meetings, while allowing everyone (even the difficult parent) to be heard -- within reason!

Good luck!

New pres this year and my first meeting was an awful experience. We have a very negative strong opinionated parent that comes to every meeting. How do you deal with a member that everyone is afraid to disagree with? Because of issues with our school and the possibility that it may be closed next year the meeting was more of a gripe session. As president can I ask that we only focus on the agenda and leave our gripes at the door? I don't want to sound like I am a control freak, but we had new parents there and I didn't want them to get the wrong impression. We are Christians and you would have never guessed it at our first meeting. I was ashamed that I was even sitting in that room. Any suggestions?