Question: Chairs on PTO board

An officer from last year is a chair for the upcoming year...I feel like she is trying to "force" a mom onto me...wanting her on the board. This woman has been active prior years and now has another child entering the school. She can help all she wants, but I have people on the board that find this woman to be pushy and would rather have her just help out, then have her at board meetings. How do I let people know that I have chosen my chairs (the ex-Pres. then said let her co with me...I have other parents that have never been asked to help and want to as well) and not feel "guilty" or continued to feel like the bad guy?

Asked by Anonymous



Advice from PTO Today

Rose H writes:
Hi there!
People like this (the one who is pushing this person on you) can get under your skin, but try not to let her make you feel guilty. You aren't the bad guy. In fact, make sure it doesn't get personal by simply telling this person you want to play by the rules so that you are fair to everyone. Tell her it wouldn't be fair to let this woman just become a "co" when you know lots of other folks would like to do it as well and you need to make sure everyone has a chance. Also, as far as attending board meetings, tell her you really want to keep attendance to board meeting and committee chairs and if this person tags along, well, it wouldn't be fair to all the other parents who would also like to attend.

You might want to give this a quick read before handling this: Dealing with Difficult People.

Good luck!
Rose C.

Community Advice

kaybee writes:
If you have more then one person interested in the position have a sign up date and a vote. Paper ballot that way you are not picking and if this person is voted in then she is voted in.

Community Advice

annetteswitzer writes:
As an officer you have to make sure that it is not a personal conflict. You represent the board and the parents. If a parent wants to get involved or be a board member, they have that right just as much as you do. There is a check and balance to the system of fairness and everyone's voice matters. If the other mother wants to be a board member or committee member, It should always be through a vote. Even committee chairs should be take to a vote. That way there is no favoritism on an officers part. It is not for the officers or board members to decide who can or can not chair a committee or be a board matter how "pushy" you may feel they are. Sometimes it's the pushy ones that get things done and you can rely on the most.

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